Various and Sundry Medical Maladies (Weekly Recap 8)

PicMonkey Collage

This is technically two weeks worth of information. Obviously a weekly thing is harder to keep up than I thought:

  • Gypsy has ringworm. I’m a little disappointed with the shelter where we got her because as they were parting ways with us, the kitten coordinator said, “Oh, by the way, she might have ringworm.” She recommended Lotrimin and sent us on our merry way. Made it sound like no big deal. Let me make it clear that there was no “might” about it. She had ringworm so badly that I immediately made a vet appt. about it. One week after, the vet said that it was bad enough to give her several topical treatments. Two weeks after, the vet included a pill because she was getting new, worse spots. Almost three weeks into having this sweet ball of scaly love in our home, she’s finally starting to get over it. With that said, she’s got about 15 spots all over her tiny kitten body. This shit is virulent. It doesn’t seem to make her itch or be uncomfortable, but it’s a huge inconvenience for all of us. She doesn’t like baths, micellar wipes, or pills. Couple that with treatments for intestinal worms, and there is a large chunk of the day where I’m pretty sure our sweet kitten hates me. She’s got the good grace to have a short-term memory about it all and forgives me. In all honesty, I think it’s more scarring for us. With all of that said (along with various other weird interactions with the shelter), I am not a huge fan. At least they are no-kill. Props to them for finding homes for a ton of needy kitties.
  • In the name of full disclosure, I do have a spot of ringworm on my arm. To compare this to another experience — I got lice in high school from the lockers in gym class and that was way worse. Several months of worse. Ringworm is at least manageable. Easy to isolate, easier to eliminate in a shorter amount of time. If I ever get lice again, I’m shaving my f***ing head. Worst. Ever. Ringworm is nothing in comparison to that mess. I have a worse rash from wearing a latex bandaid than the actual ringworm.
  • Our ceiling is leaking again. Maintenance came to check it out and I never heard from them again. Aside from drips into the bathtub at 6 am, when our neighbor’s kids get ready for school, it isn’t much of a nuisance. Until, you know, black mold forms and the ceiling collapses. Whatev. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • I started going to a swimming class with my friend Suzy. 1) It’s full of seniors that 2) make me look like a completely out of shape noodle of sad, as predicted on both counts. I love it. I went last week, but skipped this week because I wanted to avoid the possibility of spreading ringworm to the entire populace. You’re welcome, Raleigh.
  • Work kind of slowed down. One client finally posted my job (which was temporary until they found someone who would work full-time for them), so that’s a slight bummer. But another client that I thought was a one-off turned into a monthly gig. It all evens out. This will give me more time to work on side projects. Definitely worth it. I don’t think I could have kept that pace up and I’ve been itching (not ringworm-related) to fit in some creative stuff. I’ve got sewing projects, a comic, and writing projects in the works. At first I was bummed about losing the client, but it really is for the better. Onward and upward!
  • Mike got the flu last week. I took care of him through that, along with the worst of the ringworm epidemic. This is the first time in my personal history that I was the only one in a given group that wasn’t terribly sick. Since I am most definitely not going to contract flu from Mike now, I can confidently say that without the fear of making myself a liar. I think…
  • Mike bought me a printer and Thin Mints for Valentine’s Day. THE BEST EVER. If you knew how many times I drove to FedEx to print stuff each week, you’d fully understand. We spent the day being lazy and that’s all a girl could want.
  • More adventure-based updates: We took Gypsy on her first harness walk and she did fantastically. We saved a bullied, injured goose by a local pond. I went on my first trail run in forever and it felt amazinnnnnngggg.
  • As I was running frantically through the store the other day, I picked up a generic packet of wipes for Gypsy. She had intestinal worms, so one of the symptoms of that is something we lovingly call “poopfoot”. She even earned the nickname Princess Poopfoot because it was happening so frequently. The best side effect is her tendency to run as fast as she can from the litter box because she knows I will be coming to make her presentable again. She’s had a rough little life, guys. Anyway, I got these wipes because they were cheap and said “flushable”. I didn’t want to run the risk of her getting into her wormy, skidmarked paperwork in the trash. Even though I live in the city now, I will always be mortally afraid to flush anything other than paper. After living in Pratt for so many years where an annual sewer backup was so regular that you could set a watch to it… well, one doesn’t tend to take chances. Anyway, now that Gypsy’s problem has been mostly taken care of through miracles of pharmaceutical science, and I ran out of my daily face wipes, I have been using the rest of them for my face. The main points I wanted to make here are as follows:

    1) My horrible breakouts are clearing up. These wipes are freaking amazing and contain such marvels as aloe and chamomile, while going light on words I can’t pronounce. Score!
    2) Even though these were generic and cheap, I finally read the fine print and realized that I had picked the wipes specifically engineered for cleansing a butt hole.
    3) There are endless puns to make about this and I intend to do so until everyone hates me.
    4) Why are we, as consumers, caring more for butt holes than our faces? Why is it cheaper to do so, when people see more of our faces than the aforementioned (I hope)?
    5) I wasted a lot of time thinking about this.
    6) I will continue to treat myself like a butt hole, thank you very much. See #3. The puns will continue.

What medical maladies are you currently undergoing? Are you using wipes meant for your anus on your face? Let me know in the comments!

~ Meg

17 thoughts on “Various and Sundry Medical Maladies (Weekly Recap 8)

  1. I hope you’re all on the mend. I brought my dog into the vet 2 weeks ago because she had a lump on her hind end, but she was diagnosed with “love handles”. Oops.

    • I hope Wally gets over his fleas soon. Poor guy!
      Oh yeah? Are they TJ brand? How far do you drive to get them? Want me to mail you some? Lol
      I may never go back from my butt wipes. My face isn’t nearly as dried out as it usually is. And the fact that it’s a pack of 48, $3 cheaper than the packs of 20… well, it’s just too good.

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